i love you more than funny quotes

The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is. ~G.B. Shaw, Man and Superman, 1905



It is always the best policy to tell the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar. ~Jerome K. Jerome



Being neurotic is like shooting fish in a barrel, and missing them. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966



The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil. ~Author Unknown



Tough and funny and a little bit kind: that is as near to perfection as a human being can be. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966



Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment. ~Robert Benchley



The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. ~George Bernard Shaw



Never dull your shine for somebody else. ~Tyra Banks, America's Next Top Model, "The Girl Who Is Afraid of Heights," original airdate 17 October 2007



A politician should have three hats. One for throwing into the ring, one for talking through, and one for pulling rabbits out of if elected. ~Carl Sandburg



The happiest thing that can be said about democracy... is that it is one of the few systems that has been willing to risk a long period of confusion and mixed purposes for the sake of giving man a chance to grow up in mind and responsibility. ~H.A. Overstreet



A faith like Lincoln's would transform the world! ~James Oppenheim



The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office. ~Robert Frost



"Why, flowers are violent, cruel, terrible and splendid... like love!" He picked a ranunculus which gently swayed its golden head above the grass beside him, and with infinite delicacy, slowly and amorously, he turned it between his fat red fingers, from which the dried blood scaled off in places: "Isn't it adorable?" he repeated, looking at it. "It's so little, so fragile, and besides, it's all of nature; all the beauty and power of nature. It contains the world. A puny and relentless organism which goes straight to the goal of its desire! Ah, milady, flowers do not indulge in sentiment. They indulge in passion, nothing but passion. And they make love all the time, and in every fashion. They think of nothing else; and how right they are! Perverse? Because they obey the only law of life; because they are satisfied with the only need of life, which is love? But consider, milady, the flower is only a reproductive organ. Is there anything healthier, stronger, or more beautiful than that? These marvelous petals, those silks, these velvets... these soft, supple, and caressing materials are the curtains of the alcove, the draperies of the bridal chamber, the perfumed bed where they unite, where they pass their ephemeral and immortal life, swooning with love. What an admirable example for us!" ~"The Garden," Chapter 6



He that is born to be hanged shall never be drowned. ~Author Unknown



Men are made stronger on realization that the helping hand they need is at the end of their own arm. ~Sidney J. Phillips



Without a pen I feel naked, but it's writing that is my exhibitionism. ~Carrie Latet



Ah gravity, thou art a heartless bitch. ~From the television show The Big Bang Theory, written by Chuck Lorre, Bill Prady, Robert Cohen, and Dave Goetsch, "The Big Bran Hypothesis"



Everybody tells me that they would love to knit, but they don't have time. I look at people's lives and I can see opportunity and time for knitting all over the place. The time spent riding the bus each day? That's a pair of socks over a month. Waiting in line? Mittens. Watching TV? Buckets of wasted time that could be an exquisite lace shawl. ~Stephanie Pearl-McPhee, At Knit's End: Meditations for Women Who Knit Too Much



A hole in one is amazing when you think of the different universes this white mass of molecules has to pass through on its way to the hole. ~Mac O'Grady



One's own self is well hidden from one's own self; of all mines of treasure, one's own is the last to be dug up. ~Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche