One of my readers sent in a request to talk about going natural and the different steps and trials and tribulations you will encounter. I have gone through this process twice myself the first time being much shorter then the second. I have had quite a few friends go through the same as well and trust me when I say this is not for the weak at heart. Before you journey off through your process of going from relaxed to natural you must educate yourself as I learned that the hard way.
I had my first relaxer when I was 10 and had been relaxing up until I was in my mid 20's. When my hair was first relaxed it was thick and beautiful as it had a great bounce to it even after the relaxer. Through the years I noticed that the relaxer began to eat my hair, meaning it didn't have that same thickness or bounce to it. Instead when I would receive a relaxer the next day it was flat and limp, not sexy at all. Due to this I decided to go natural in late 2007. At this time I stopped relaxing for four months which was a great stretch for me as I received a relaxer no longer then two months in passing. Through this 2007 through early 2008 process my hair was very dry and as the new growth came in more and more I didn't know what to do with it so I went to an expensive hair stylist. I received a consultation and decided that this was the route to take at least for a short time as I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't want to cut my hair and I also didn't want a relaxer so I thought the hair stylist would help me on my path. The hair stylist decided to straighten my hair via rollers, blow dryer and flat iron at a cost of $80. This seemed great at first but I noticed when I left the salon the next day the curly roots were starting to curl back up and the remaining relaxed ends were dull and frizzy. Once again I had no idea how to take care of my hair at this stage so the hair stylist I was going to at that time decided that I should just relax my hair as stated by him it was fine textured but to thick to go natural. Going against what I wanted I did this and now I was back to square one. Great, not only did I go back to square one but the bill became more expensive. The relaxer looked great at first but once again my hair didn't have that fullness that I longed for.
After a while I didn't relax for about three months and I ventured off to another hair stylist. Key point ladies: If the hair stylist hair is a mess then they should not be doing yours. I went to this hairstylist who stated that my hair was broken as some of the relaxed ends had broken off due to prolonging my relaxer, so she said to cut the relax ends off and start over with a relaxer, otherwise my hair would be hard to manage. I told her I didn't want a relaxer but if she could cut it and straighten that would be fine. To say the least after the straightening fiasco I felt like my hair was extremely fried after leaving but I went a second time to get a relaxer (confused) and never went back again. I relaxed my hair for a long while after this but I was not satisfied as that wasn't what I really wanted.
Finally, I had my last relaxer November 2008 and that is when I began my natural hair journey the correct way and haven't looked back since. I started by conducting hair research on transitioning from relaxed to natural. Through this I found http://www.longhaircareforum.com/ which in turn has a thread which gives tips and support to those going through the natural hair journey. Through this I found many links to blogs (Curly Niki for instance) that were based on women who went from relaxed to natural and have no reason to look back. Through long hair care I figured out that moisture as well as detangling was very important when transitioning. When transitioning there is a line called The Demarcation line which is where the natural hair meets the relaxed hair. At this line your hair becomes weak as your relaxed tresses are not nearly as strong as your natural tresses. I swore I wouldn't cut off my relaxed hair (which you have to do to be completely natural) until I made one year of transitioning. Well in August 2009 I changed my mind as I was over the demarcation line and I cut off my relaxed ends (tears included) and presented my twa. It was scary, I was emotional and both me and hubby were shell shocked. After I or we got over the shock of having the shortest hair I have ever had, I began to enjoy my curly locks as they truly fit me. After the cut I researched on co-washing, how often I should wash my hair, different types of natural hairstyles (even though wash and go's were my friend in the beginning), products, home made hair care recipes, youtube videos on how to take care of and style natural hair and just your everyday maintenance. At the end I learned that my hair doesn't have to be straight to be beautiful and in turn through research l learned how to stretch and somewhat straighten my hair without the use of heat which can be very damaging as well. After all of my trials and tribulations I realized that I was so confused because I wasn't sure how to accept my natural curls even though I longed for hair like Tracey Ellis Ross. When I cut my hair and let the curls shine through I felt complete with my beauty inside and out which is a great feeling I didn't have before.
As you can see from the above many women you know may have gone through the same thing or maybe you went through it yourself. Just know that you are not alone and if going natural is what you want then it is something that you should do, you definitely will not be satisfied until you do. Just remember, research, knowledge, patience and some positive advice will help you go a long way in this journey. Some will try to deter you into other actions but persevere and do what is right for you as you can make yourself truly happy from within.
I myself came out a more stronger and beautiful person inside and out for it. Hair doesn't make you, you make the hair. So work it ladies!
Stay Fab!
No comments:
Post a Comment