funny quotes cute

We're Americans - with a capital A! And do you know what that means? Do you? It means that our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world. ~From the movie Stripes



Read over your compositions, and when you meet a passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out. ~Samuel Johnson, "Recalling the Advice of a College Tutor," Boswell, Life of Johnson, 1791



And as the seasons come and go, here's something you might like to know. There are fairies everywhere: under bushes, in the air, playing games just like you play, singing through their busy day. So listen, touch, and look around - in the air and on the ground. And if you watch all nature's things, you might just see a fairy's wing. ~Author Unknown



There is a time for departure even when there's no certain place to go. ~Tennessee Williams (Thomas Lanier)



The shortest distance between two points is under construction. ~Noelie Altito



Boast not thyself of to morrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth. ~Proverbs 27:1



We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. ~Kurt Vonnegut



Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor. ~Ogden Nash



All that Adam had, all that Caesar could, you have and can do.... Build, therefore, your own world. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson, Nature



To eat an egg, you must break the shell. ~Jamaican Proverb



I'm not religious, but I like God and he likes me. ~Tony Kushner, Angels in America



A child can ask questions that a wise man cannot answer. ~Author Unknown



It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to. ~J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye, Chapter 21



I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read his prescription. ~Finley Peter Dunne



They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken. ~Author Unknown



Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. ~Melody Beattie



There's no point in burying a hatchet if you're going to put up a marker on the site. ~Sydney Harris



A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life. ~Irish Saying



Men are clinging to football on a level we aren't even aware of. For centuries, we ruled everything, and now, in the last ten minutes, there are all these incursions by women. It's our Alamo. ~Tony Kornheiser



Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest? ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com